


A Feline Intervention

by STARSdidathing



Category: Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Cats, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Cats, Clint Barton & Natasha Romanov Friendship, Clint Barton Is a Good Bro, Crushes, Cutesy, Fluff, Happy, Idiots in Love, Insecure Tony, Loki Feels, M/M, Mischief, Mischief Managed, Mutual Pining, Natasha Romanov Is a Good Bro, Pining, Tony Feels, Wordcount: 5.000-10.000
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-14
Updated: 2017-10-14
Packaged: 2019-01-17 04:57:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,278
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12357951
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/STARSdidathing/pseuds/STARSdidathing
Summary: It doesn't take Natasha long to realise what is wrong with her human. It takes her even less time to work out that Loki's fixation is actually withClint'shuman and that Loki has no idea that the man he desires lives directly above them.





	A Feline Intervention

**Author's Note:**

> I’ve had the idea/been working on and off on this since February. _February_. And, okay, maybe I have stories that have been wip’s for much longer, and maybe there are documents not even started from years ago BUT I’VE WANTED THIS FINISHED FOR AGES OKAY. It’s been on my “to complete” list for months and I’m _so happy it’s done, okay_. Lol.
> 
> Sooo yes, heh. I hope you enjoy it :)
> 
>  **Edit:** Jeez that was a pain to post. I have six drafts just trying to make it go through without erroring. FINALLY IT IS UP THOUGH. PHEW.
> 
> ... WAIT. DID THIS SERIOUSLY POST LIKE 5 TIMES??? THE FUCK??? OMG I JUST SPENT LIKE TEN MINUTES FREAKING OUT. THAT WAS SO FUCKING STRESSFUL AND IT WOULDN'T LET ME DELETE ANYTHING DESPITE TRYING MULTIPLE TIMES. OMG. I JUST KEPT HITTING DELETE IN MULTIPLE BROWSERS UNTIL IT WENT THROUGH. I'M SO SORRY. OMG I NEED SOMETHING TO DEAL WITH THE STRESS OF THAT. JFC D:
> 
> I AM SO SORRY FOR FLOODING YOUR INBOX EVERYONE. D: *HANDS APOLOGETIC COOKIES*

When it came to humans, Natasha would say that she had a rather reasonable one.

Loki fed her well, treated her with respect and rarely bothered her with the ridiculous and absurd things that humans seemed determined to worry over. Loki had been Natasha’s third human and he was far better than the previous ones. She had been happy with him for the last few years, but everything had changed when the _other_ human had been noticed.

It had taken Natasha a few weeks of half-hearted listening before she’d connected the man that Loki spoke of so fondly with Clint’s human.

Clint was the [ginger male](http://www.findcatnames.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/07/ginger-cat-names-3.jpg) that lived above and to the right of her and had moved in a year ago. They occasionally talked from their balconies when it was warm and they’d found a patch of light that they both liked. Clint’s human was named Tony and had rescued him from the streets a few years ago.

Natasha had respect for any human who was willing to traipse through alleyways to find injured felines so she started paying greater attention to Loki’s attraction after that.

Loki was - as far as Natasha had been able to tell - very predatory in how he normally took his mates. His sudden inability to be so forward in the face of Clint’s human was very peculiar to her. 

She had heard of humans altering their mating patterns when they chose a more permanent mate, but Natasha hadn’t thought Loki to be so serious over a human he had barely met. Natasha supposed she would never quite understand humans. Regardless, she did know that _her_ human had chosen _Clint’s_ human, and it was up to her to discover if Clint’s human was receptive of Loki.

It had meant sitting on the railing of the balcony, her tail flicking as she waited for Clint to be allowed out. Tony, it seemed, did not work the same way that Loki did. Loki left in the early morning and returned in the afternoons for five days, remained at home for the next two only to then repeat the pattern. Tony by comparison, was far more nocturnal. 

She hoped that wouldn’t create too much annoyance when the humans began to integrate.

Natasha was pondering that very thought when she heard the door open and a mumbled, “Yeah, go get your sunlight. God, I need a coffee. Fucking early morning cat, what the fuck did I do to deserve...”

The rest trailed off as Clint’s human walked away and Clint poked his head between the bars of the balcony to smile down at her. “Hey, Nat.”

“Clint,” she greeted simply.

He frowned a little. “What’s up?” He leant further forward. “Something happen? Your human treating you right?”

Her mouth twitched, amused and slightly flattered by his concern. “Yes. He’s decided on a permanent mate.”

Clint eyed her for a moment before he brightened. “And you like who he picked! I’m glad! It’s bad when-”

“It’s your human.”

Clint jerked back slightly, and blinked, completely shocked. He even turned to look over his shoulder before back at Natasha. “But... he never... Tony tells me _everything_. _**Insistently**_.”

She almost smiled in amusement. She would train Clint’s human out of that if the man intended to reside in her apartment and continue his chatter when she wished to sleep. Of course, she would need them to progress before she could begin to do that.

“Your human is not aware of my human’s affections,” she told Clint, her tail increasing its speed and showing her displeasure. “I am growing irritated by it.”

“What do you want me to do?” Clint asked, before his eyes widened and he quickly caught on. He shook his head. “That’s human problems. I don’t get involved in that, Nat.”

Natasha narrowed her eyes at him. “I have assisted you with _your_ problems.”

He whined lowly and buried his head between his paws. She heard him hiss under his breath, ‘ _you drop one fucking toy_.’

Natasha had been about to reply when she heard Clint’s human and the door opening further behind the other feline. “Clint. Do not kill a bird. I swear to God, you better not be- _oh_.”

Clint’s human’s was looking down over the ledge, his brown eyes blinking in surprise as he caught her gaze and smiled. “[Cute cat](https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/b7/82/a9/b782a99d9d23150b96fedca7b59c8df1--color-patterns-calico-cats.jpg).” His smile then fell and he looked at Clint and then back at her. “Ohhh no. We aren’t playing that game. No kids, no kittens, I am not-” Clint’s sudden movement and Tony’s coinciding shriek made Natasha smirk and twitch her tail in satisfaction. “Fuck. Okay, I either embarrassed you or you just very loudly declared _no kids_. Jeez.” 

Tony had bent down to pull Clint’s claw out of whatever it had dug into and was now holding him by the scruff of the neck and glaring. “That’s it. I’m pulling rank. No Romeo and Juliet for you. Say good _bye_ to your girlfriend. Er.” He flicked his eyes down. “Boyfriend?” Natasha hissed and the human’s mouth pulled to the side in an embarrassed grimace. “Right. Girlfriend. God, I need more coffee.”

He turned and started heading back into his apartment after that, but Natasha still heard Clint shout. “ _Fucker_. I’ll give you romance. Romeo and Romeo is on. I’m helping you, Nat!”

Satisfied with herself, Natasha hopped down onto the balcony floor before making her way back inside with a wide smirk and more than a few plans forming in her mind. She would have Loki gain his mate, it was just a matter of time.

* * *

The two cats had discussed a plan when Clint was next allowed back on the balcony, but it still took them a week to put it into effect. Tony had been eying her suspiciously so Natasha had made herself scarce in order to limit the paranoia of Clint’s human.

His only chance, Clint had informed her, was when one of Tony’s friends was visiting. He couldn’t predict it unfortunately, which made it difficult as Loki rarely remained at the apartment during the day, but it was their best chance to facilitate a meeting; they needed Clint to escape and make his way to Loki. He only needed a few moments and an open door to achieve it; the trick would be for Clint to make his way down the stairs before he was caught. 

Natasha had to admit, with some chagrin, that she had more faith in Clint succeeding then she did with Loki’s own attempts at encouraging a meeting with the other man.

Her human didn’t mope, exactly, but he _did_ talk under his breath while making her dinner. He cursed at himself and fixated on how he was attracted to ‘ _fucking Tony Stark, god_ ’. She had sat at his feet staring at him, trying to work out how Loki could be so hesitant over another human.

It seemed to revolve around three specific phrases, the first of which made him groan loudly when he finished, ( _He’s a billionaire, Loki, and you’re the only one who knows. You keep his fucking secret and you stop wanting to fuck him. Shit._ ) the second made him dig his fingers in his hair, his palms over his face and eyes, ( _I am not Googling if he’s attracted to men. Not again. Fuck._ ) and the third filled Loki with a wistful longing and frustration that Natasha had never heard before, ( _He’s so cute though and he was funny when we did talk... before I found out_.)

He’d turned to her a few times and asked, “I liked him before I knew. I mean, I would have asked him out but then his stupid secret was blown and will it... will it look like I only want him for the money now? Fuck. I know that’s what he’ll think.”

Natasha had tried to tell him to stop being an idiot, but he didn’t listen to her. He just grimaced deeper and petted her head, mumbling further self-deprecating things until Natasha’s claws twitched to scratch him.

She’d never seen her human like this and it made her certain that the only excuse for his behaviour was that he had found his true life-mate. It was why she was willing to retract her claws and actively interfere.

It was also why relief flowed through her when she heard Clint meowing at their front door on a day when Loki was home. Loki looked confused, turning to the door with wide eyes and incredulity. Natasha just tried not to snigger at Clint’s yowling.

He was exaggerating his voice, playing a distressed tone for her human’s ears but he was actually cursing at Natasha. “You better be here. You and your damn human. I hurled myself down the stairs and Tony is panicked. _I do not like him panicked_. Do you know how possessive he gets? This better be worth it, you manipulative little-”

Natasha had jumped off the couch and had a perfect view of Loki opening the door on Clint and surprising him. Loki bent down instantly but used careful and slow movements while he remarked, “Hello there.”

Clint meowed again and Loki petted him until he seemed pliant enough for Loki to pick up. Natasha had walked over to meet them and Loki was looking between the two of them curiously as she greeted Clint, “Does your human follow you?”

“Of course he does,” Clint told her, miffed. “He loves me.”

Loki’s fingers were sliding under Clint’s collar to turn it, mumbling words of comfort and trying to ease Clint’s worries - not that he wasn’t anything but relaxed in Loki’s arms. The sudden shout of Clint’s name however, made Loki stiffen and freeze. He soon looked at Clint with nothing but horror while Clint just purred happily and Natasha pressed her body against Loki’s leg, lending her terrified human strength.

Tony hurtled down the stairs and into the hallway, his eyes wide and worried as he searched for a glimpse of ginger. It took him all of a moment to notice Loki and Clint.

“You have my cat,” he announced, sounding more shocked than unhappy about the situation. 

Loki opened his mouth and closed it before swallowing, all of his alarm being carefully hidden. “He was crying at my door, I didn’t know he was yours.”

Tony frowned. “Why would he-” Natasha took the moment to meow pointedly, making Clint’s human look at her. He turned a quick glare on Clint. “You ran away for your _girlfriend?_ Are you serious, Clint? I told you that you are not Romeo and that we are _not_ playing that game.”

There was a moment’s silence as Tony walked the rest of the way over and held out his arms for his cat. Loki hesitated a moment before passing Clint over even while remarking, “You seem to have a bit more knowledge of the situation than I do.”

"Ah," Tony actually looked awkward. "Sorry. I, um, caught them chatting to each other the other week." Loki still seemed confused and Tony's embarrassment only grew. "Well, meowing. I live above you, apparently, and they like each other, I guess? Not that I can speak cat... even though I'm kind of implying that they speak at all. Er."

Natasha could see Loki fighting down a smile. “I would say all animals have a form of communication.” Loki glanced down at her before over to Clint. “But I’m glad he didn’t get far before you could find him.”

Tony snorted, seeming to recover from his uncertainty. “I think the phrase ‘beeline’ could be used for what he just did.”

Loki was about to reply when another voice interrupted, shouting somewhat desperately, “Clint? _Clint!_ ”

Tony turned to call over his shoulder, “I found him, Rhodey!”

Another human quickly entered the hall, looking relieved beyond measure as he came up to Tony and Loki. Natasha could feel herself tense and her hair rising over the way the other human got into Tony’s space easily and patted Clint with familiar affection. She didn’t like the way _her_ human began to withdraw.

“Shit, I’m glad he’s okay.” The human looked up at Loki and smiled. “Hey, thanks for finding my friend’s cat. He might have killed me if we hadn’t.”

Natasha only relaxed once Loki did. Clint was just looking at her with great amusement. She didn’t care; her priority was her human.

“Next time,” Tony told the new human, “don’t open the door so wide and I won’t have to.”

“Your cat has never _fled_ before, Tony.”

“It’s not my fault he’s kind of desperate for his new girlfriend.” Tony nodded down at Natasha. “Thankfully Loki was able to catch him.”

The flash of realisation that went through Rhodey’s eyes interested Natasha; it meant Tony had _spoken_ about Loki. Perhaps it would take less time than she had suspected before they would become mates.

“I was happy to help,” Loki told them before reaching down and picking up Natasha while she was distracted. “Hopefully Clint doesn’t try to come visit Natasha again, but if he does, I’ll know where to take him back to.”

“Yeah, thanks for that,” Tony answered quickly, flashing a smile. “But we’ll get out of your hair. See you around.”

Turning on his heel, he was quick to be followed by Rhodey who gave Loki a smile and a wave. Loki didn’t hesitate to shut the door after that, but he did press his forehead against it the moment it was shut. He was quick to let out a pained and frustrated groan. Natasha just meowed at him curiously.

“You’re not supposed to befriend a billionaire’s cat, Nat.” He shifted so he could look down at her with one eye. “You’re not supposed to _date_ the guy’s cat when _I_ don’t even have a chance at dating _him_.”

Natasha remained sitting patiently in Loki’s hold, wondering if he would say anything of use to her or if he would remain lost in thoughts of Clint’s human.

He did surprise her when he chuckled, looking ridiculously charmed. “He didn’t even put on shoes. He was too busy looking for his cat. That shouldn’t be so fucking endearing.”

Loki sighed heavily when he was finished before pushing away from the door and taking them both over to the couch. He sat down on it heavily and held her in his lap, petting her coat while staring up at the ceiling. Natasha shifted so that she could do the same.

She wondered if it would be different, living a level higher and if she’d like it better. Clint did say more pigeons landed on his balcony than hers and she did like the idea of being able to chase them. 

She hoped it wouldn’t take her too long before she could try it.

* * *

Clint could tell Tony wasn’t happy with him. He was gripping him almost painfully tight and his mouth was a thin line. Clint tried a pathetic meow but Tony just glared at him. Rhodey, at least, seemed a little more understanding. “He’s just a cat, Tony, he didn’t do it to deliberately worry you.”

“Of all the cats in all the god damn building,” Tony hissed.

“Yeah, I noticed that,” Rhodey remarked. “He’s the guy who found out who you are?”

Tony let out a rough breath as they reached his apartment door and pushed it open. Shutting it behind them, Tony placed Clint on the ground before turning towards the kitchen, even while he was answering Rhodey, “Yeah. Loki Förestner. He’s a marketing executive.”

Clint quickly jumped up onto one of the barstools so that he could keep both humans in sight. They were ignoring him now as Tony made them coffee. Rhodey was watching Tony though, very carefully. 

“He’s attractive too,” Rhodey remarked. “Just your type.” Tony tensed, pausing mid-motion. “The kind of person I could see you lingering in the laundry room waiting to see, especially when you knew he was coming down to wash his clothes.”

“Speculation isn’t fact, Rhodey,” Tony answered tightly.

“No, but how else would you be so distracted that you left your _wallet_ in the pocket of one of your pants so that it could fall out for him to find.”

Tony’s shoulders dropped with the force of his sigh and Clint frowned at seeing his human so distressed. “Yeah. Okay. He’s hot and funny and the kind of guy I would have let fuck me in a _second_ back when I was only looking for a fling.”

“But you’re not looking for a fling anymore,” Rhodey acknowledged.

“I left the spotlight for a lot of very good reasons, Rhodey. I don’t want to be with someone again who’s only dating Tony Stark and his money.” He looked over at his friend. “I want them to be dating _me_ , scars and all - and how the hell can I trust that Loki will see me like that now? _If_ he even wants me like that. We weren’t exactly flirting with intent before he found out.”

Turning away from Rhodey, the shorter man continued with the coffees. His movements were jerky and his shoulders near his ears from tension and discomfort. Clint didn’t like it.

He hopped onto the counter, despite knowing Tony hated him doing it, so that he could walk across the bench to reach Tony and rub his cheek against his human’s arm in comfort. Tony looked down at him only to smile softly and gently pet Clint’s head. “Yeah, yeah, apology accepted Puss in Boots. Not like you knew I was trying to avoid him.”

“What are you going to do now?” Rhodey asked him.

Tony let out a bark of laughter before pushing Rhodey’s coffee towards the dark-skinned man. “Keep Clint off the balcony and away from the door.”

“And Loki?” Tony’s eyes flickered away and over to Clint. He petted him instead of looking at his friend. “Tony?”

Clint just watched his human, seeing his tight grimace; his downcast eyes and feeling himself just want to help - to _heal_ his human’s pain. “Now I know the more specific part of the building I need to avoid.”

Rhodey sighed and lightly gripped Tony’s shoulder while Clint just tilted his head and watched his human curiously. It was true that he didn’t see Tony interact with many other humans as Tony preferred to live almost exclusively in his apartment with very few visitors but... this was different.

It reminded Clint of the period three months ago when Tony had walked back into the apartment with depressed features. When Tony hadn’t spoken to Clint and had instead just cuddled him close for numerous hours. He hadn’t mentioned Loki, hadn’t mentioned another human but Clint could infer enough to realise the truth.

Tony had picked Loki as his mate, but believed Loki wasn’t receptive of him. 

Clint had never understood how humans made their interactions so complicated, but he supposed it didn’t truly matter. Nat had noticed the connection and now Clint had seen it too; their humans wanted each other.

But, if they weren’t willing to help themselves become mates then it was simply up to him and Nat to make sure that they gained each other.

Surely, it couldn’t be that hard... could it?

* * *

Natasha was irritated.

Not only had Clint’s human made no further contact with Loki since their meeting but he had in fact _refused_ to open the balcony door for Clint. She had heard the other cat’s muffled calling from her own landing but Clint hadn’t been allowed out to speak with her.

She was unimpressed.

It had been a week since they’d facilitated the meeting between the humans and Loki was as despondent as ever. Staring wistfully at the ceiling only to curse at himself almost directly afterwards and busy himself with some odd task.

Natasha had little doubt that the smaller human was also monitoring Clint’s approach to any doors or windows to make sure he could not escape again. It made Natasha _certain_ that Tony would not allow Clint to be the instigator of another meeting. It meant that she had to take matters into her own paws.

She had patiently waited until Loki had left for the first day in his weekly ritual, giving her a pat and a promise to return in a few hours. She waited long enough that she could no longer hear him in the hall before she made her way onto the balcony in order to eye Clint’s higher platform. It was not terribly far from hers, merely above and to the right of her own.

Natasha knew that she was particularly limber for a feline and she was proud of such a skill. It had assisted her when she’d had a less... kind owner and had needed to hide and eventually flee. Now it would serve her again and for a different but truly important purpose. 

Loki would have his mate. She would simply need to... prompt her human to visit him.

It was difficult and she could not afford to calculate wrong, but Loki was especially fond of plants and had a few that he hung from the roof of his balcony. Natasha made sure to utilise them as she hopped onto the railing before pouncing on a low hanging basket. She then clawed her way on top of it, balancing herself as she begun to swing it slightly. It was still a dangerous distance, but Natasha was determined. She waited until she was as close as she could get without tipping the plant to the floor. She then leapt the distance needed to grip her paws between the bars of Clint’s balcony. She dangled for a few worrying moments before she was able to pull and push herself up and over the ledge. 

She took a moment to take a careful breath and assess herself for any damage but upon finding not a hair out of place, she shook off the soil that had collected on her paws before she let herself investigate. The view from the higher perch was enjoyable, she would admit, but otherwise, the balcony was not much different from her own; a little empty, perhaps, and unable to hold her interest for long because of it. Natasha turned instead to the other human’s apartment and door that was keeping the other feline from assisting her.

Natasha sat down in front of it daintily, her tail twitching with faint satisfaction as she began to meow loudly, hoping to catch Clint, if not the human’s, attention.

It didn’t take her very long to succeed.

Clint was something of a blur as he rushed to the door and stopped directly in front of her. He was shocked for all of a moment before he was laughing and praising her for her feat while demanding how she did it. Natasha was trying to contain her proud smirk even while she was giving her attention to the smaller human who had followed after Clint with confusion. He had frozen when he spotted her, staring, completely flabbergasted at her appearance on his balcony. 

Raising a paw, she pressed it against the window, tilted her head and meowed softly, hoping to incite him to allow her inside. He still looked incredulous but he made his way over, shooing Clint aside before opening the door. 

“How the hell did you get up here?” he asked, looking between her and the side of his balcony with dubious and faintly horrified eyes. Natasha just stepped inside, scanning his apartment as she did.

It was filled with boxes of electronics as well as rather appealing looking furniture. The room was... cluttered but not painfully so. There were a vast number of cat toys as if the human hadn’t known what to purchase and had merely grabbed one of everything. Natasha rather approved of it; there would be very little that Loki would have to change for the new living arrangement to be acceptable.

“I always knew you could get up to my balcony,” Clint told her, sounding proud and impressed; she just smirked at him. 

“No, seriously,” Clint’s human was continuing. “I don’t even want to imagine you jumping that distance. Oh god; how would I explain to Loki that I inadvertently killed his cat? 'I didn’t mean to make her so curious about where Clint went that she had to fucking _parkour_ her way up here'. Oh God,” Natasha looked up at the wide-eyed human. “I’m going to have to return you to him. _Oh, shit_.” Clint’s human ran a hand over his face. “I need coffee. It is too early for this.”

Natasha had expected the human to follow up on his remark, but instead he bent down and offered his hand to her. She blinked in surprise, but when he made no further move towards her, she lightly sniffed his hand before allowing him to pet her.

He had a firm stroke and scratched behind her ears. He also picked her up with ease and held her in arms that were warm and secure. Natasha purred a little, more than pleased with her human’s choice in mate.

She also had no problem with his mutterings to himself, his firm demands that Clint stay and his slow wander down to her home. Tony was quick to discover what she already knew; Loki wasn’t there and wouldn’t be for many hours. Tony cursed despairingly under his breath, resting his forehead against the door and hissing ‘ _why did it have to be **his** fucking cat?_ ’ before making the trek back upstairs. He deposited her on the ground beside Clint before grabbing a pen and some paper and making his way back out of the apartment.

Natasha looked over at Clint to inform him simply, “They will attempt to separate us again in future. I do not intend to give them such a chance.”

Clint raised his eyebrows. “Okay. What did you have in mind?”

Moving closer to him, Natasha rubbed her cheek against his own. The action made Clint rear back slightly, shocked and confused and deeply unsettled. Natasha just did it again. “Our humans have always wished to see us happy; therefore, they shall be left with no desire to see us part if it will sadden us.”

Clint gave a very weary put upon sigh, but he pressed back against her readily enough and when Tony stepped back into his apartment it was to find them curled up together and purring contently. Natasha was reasonable sure that the hopeless softening of his expression meant that he would not be enforcing their separation for very much longer.

* * *

It almost surprised her, but Natasha spent the rest of the day rather enjoying herself.

She had been concerned that she would grow irritated by the encroachment on her solitude, but Clint and his human were rather easy to accommodate.

While Clint was playful and energetic - and far more inclined to pounce or chase one of the numerous toys Tony had purchased or created for his cat’s enjoyment – he was happy to let her watch or join at her leisure. When they did play together it made Clint’s human smile and laugh at them, the sound happy and echoing through the apartment pleasantly.

Tony though, only spent an hour or so with them before he secluded himself in a room of electronics and computers. He reacted cheerfully though when she came to investigate, happily picking her up and petting her when she rubbed against his leg.

He spoke to her much like Loki did, explaining his actions and what he was creating, occasionally trailing off and staring into space. Natasha did pay close attention to the times when Tony spoke about her own human.

Clint’s human was equally enamoured by Loki, it was obvious to see. Tony also complained about how attractive Loki was, how annoyingly pretty and nice she was and how it was unfair that Loki had found out who he was as he didn’t want to make Natasha stay away from Clint just because he couldn’t trust Loki to like him for who he was.

His strange, obscure concerns were much like the ones that Loki complained of and made her wonder how humans possibly managed to mate if _these_ were the things that stopped them from pursuing their partners. She eventually grew bored and incredibly exasperated - unable to make the human understand he merely needed to _speak_ to Loki - and left Tony to his electronics and his mutterings. She settled herself on the cushion of the couch, watching Clint with amusement as he chased a red laser-light that Tony had erected for the ginger cat’s amusement. 

When Clint had grown tired, the other feline had come and flopped down beside her. Natasha had allowed it, if only to add further credibility to their ruse of affection.

“Do you think our humans will take very long to start mating?” Clint asked her, stretching out his feet before wriggling until his back was pressed against her side.

“Yes,” Natasha answered simply, having very little faith in them after watching their pitiful interactions so far.

Clint let out a loud sigh. “Thought you’d say that.” He twisted his head so that he could catch her eye, grinning slightly. “But, I guess that means you’ll be visiting here a lot, huh?”

Natasha’s mouth twitched up towards a grin, but before she could speak, she heard almost frantic knocking on Tony’s front door and was quick to recognise her human in scent and sound. She was surprised she hadn’t notice the time as she was usually well aware of how soon her human was to return. Natasha supposed that the amusing company of Clint and his human had been the cause of her distraction.

Tony seemed to have been listening for the sound though as he came out of the other room quickly, shooting them both an uneasy, almost nervous glance before he reached the door and pulled it open. Loki was there, his eyes wide and a piece of paper clutched in his hand. He looked panicked and Natasha had to physically stop herself from going to her human to try and comfort him.

“Where’s Natasha?”

Tony stood to the side and gestured into his apartment. Loki’s eyes darted over the room before landing on her. He almost rushed inside, hurrying over to the sofa and making Clint retreat so that Loki could quickly pick Natasha up and wrap her in his arms.

“Oh my god,” he whispered under his breath, holding her almost painfully tight against his chest, turning his body slightly so that he wasn’t looking anywhere near the balcony. He even shuddered and Natasha felt instantly guilty for terrifying him. She rubbed her cheek against his shirt softly, knowing her actions were done with her human's future happiness in mind, but not wanting to have worried him so badly in the interim.

“Hey, she’s fine,” Tony spoke gently, having coming to stand beside Loki. He was looking at them both with a soft expression. “She’s a ridiculously determined cat, but at least she knows how to judge her jumps.”

Loki let out a half-laugh, sounding a little broken and rough even as he started patting Natasha as opposed to merely clinging to her. Loki also dragged his eyes away from her to look at the other man. Loki seemed to notice how close they were as Natasha watched Loki swallow and felt him tense slightly. His discomfort and nerves didn't enter his voice when he told Tony gratefully, “Thank you for looking after her.”

Tony gave a lopsided smile, the kind of expression that Natasha knew Loki found ‘ _adorable_ ’ before the smaller man just shrugged. “Hey, it was fine. She’s a great cat, a calico, right?”

Loki gave his own, soft grin and nodded his agreement, but his attention was soon drawn from Tony and given to Clint. The other cat had made a point of coming over to Loki and putting his front paws on Loki’s leg, meowing pitifully. He’d stretched up as far as he could go as if he was trying to reach for Natasha, but she could see the spark of mischief in his eyes the belied the desperation of the gesture.

She made her own show of wiggling out of Loki’s arms until she was placed down on the couch and could move towards Clint, rubbing up against him until the other cat dragged her down onto the cushions with his paws. He quickly wrapped his legs around her in a hug and she purred very loudly in his embrace, making sure they heard. She heard them give identical sighs at almost the same time, sounding equally rueful and terribly fond.

“Look,” Tony began, “I really don’t want to make them miserable by locking them in our apartments just to keep them from leaping from balconies or rushing out doors.”

“Neither do I,” Loki agreed. “But I work five days a week and I can't just impose on you by giving you my cat every work day.”

But Tony was already shaking his head. “No, seriously, it’s fine. I’m pretty much always here. It won’t be that much different to me if I have one cat or two keeping me company.”

“I couldn’t ask you to look after her that often,” Loki insisted, looking uncomfortable at the very idea.

“It's really okay,” Tony told him, waving the protest off easily. “Besides, I’d certainly feel better knowing that she wasn’t downstairs crying for Clint or masterminding some new escape.”

Loki still looked uncertain and he even shifted slightly on his feet, but when he spoke, it seemed as if his discomfort for was for another reason. In fact it was _the_ reason Natasha had stepped in to solve their problems in the first place. It very nearly made her groan or roll her eyes. “That would mean seeing each other daily.”

Tony winced. “Right. Yeah. _That_.” He brought a hand to run through his hair, looking away from Loki as he let out a loud breath. “We should probably talk about it.” He gestured over his shoulder at the kitchen. “How about a drink?”

Loki chewed on his lower lip for a moment, obviously weighing up the pros and cons of the suggestion before he gave a small nod. Tony quirked a slightly tight smile before he was making his way towards the kitchen and asking what beverage Loki would prefer.

Natasha watched as Loki replied and followed after the smaller man. She had watched them intently throughout their discussion and was still dubious of this working in their favour. Clint seemed more hopeful.

“That’s a start, right?” Clint asked quietly. “They’ll be talking almost every day if they agree and Tony’s really chatty; they’ll probably end up speaking for _hours_.” He twisted to look at her better. “And you’ll be here most of the time as well. Maybe they’ll become mates sooner than we thought?”

“Perhaps,” Natasha remarked neutrally, but still had her doubts. She wanted them to realise they both desired one another, but they had already proven far too stubborn to do anything themselves.

_But, perhaps they will surprise me. Perhaps it **won’t** take further interference for them to become mates._

Well, Natasha could hope, at least.

* * *

Clint had been excited after that first day. He’d watched Tony speak with Natasha’s human and had seen them smile, laugh and gravitate towards each other, only growing more comfortable and familiar in the days that followed. He’d been certain it wouldn’t take long for the humans to claim each other as mates.

What he didn’t expect was for them both to do _nothing_.

They still spoke almost every day and Clint was even left with Loki a few times when Tony was going out. They might have started with only sharing brief conversations in the mornings before Loki left and in the afternoons when he returned - but they soon started speaking of common interests, making jokes about other humans and sometimes Loki would stay at Tony’s apartment for _hours_ in the afternoons.

Clint could not see any reason why something else hadn’t developed between them. 

Clint had complained to Natasha about it multiple times in the weeks that followed, only stopping when her own irritation at the situation coalesced into her swiping at him with her claw and growling, ‘ _Yes, I have noticed, Clint!_ ’ 

She’d then spent the rest of the afternoon perched on top of the scratching post, her tail snapping with agitation. Clint had made sure to make himself scarce. He’d instead gone and found Tony, curling up on his human’s lap and pouting and pawing at him until Tony had been forced to look down at him.

Tony had seemed to realise what had happened and he’d smiled down at Clint sadly. He’d started softly petting Clint while remarking, “Nat giving you the cold shoulder, huh?” 

Clint had meowed his agreement and Tony had scratched behind his ears. “Do me a favour and win her back, yeah?” He laughed at himself afterwards, sounding soft and sad as he continued, “I’ve gone and fallen even harder for her owner, so don’t go losing me my daily chats with him, alright?” 

Tony had closed his eyes then and tilted his head back against the chair. “Rhodey keeps telling me to just ask him out, take a chance and hope like hell that he’ll say yes to me and not to my bank account.” Tony paused before he tilted his head to the side, catching Clint’s eyes. “What do you think about that?”

 _Listen to Rhodey! Ask him out!_ Clint had answered him firmly.

Tony had nodded sagely, his eyes pained. “You’re right; nothing good comes from placing a bet on bad odds.”

 _That’s not what I said!_ Clint had yowled, wanting to put his head under his paws in pure frustration. Tony had just kept petting him, completely oblivious. “I guess it’s just gonna stay a crazy cat man friendship with the hot guy downstairs.”

Clint had been exceedingly tempted to bite him that day over Tony's stupidity, but he'd eventually refrained because of the soft, aching tone of the human’s voice. Tony wasn’t any happier about the situation than Clint was, rather, he was even more miserable. Clint just hoped that something would happen to finally make Tony and Loki realise that they were the perfect life mates and that the only things standing in the way of their happiness was _themselves_.

Yet, to Clint's mounting frustration, the humans seemed oblivious to the mutual pining and affection that they held for each other.

It had been multiple months since that first afternoon and Loki had even had dinner - _dinner!_ \- with Tony once. Clint had started to despair that he would spend the rest of his life listening to them compliment and desire each other in secret without ever confessing their feelings.

He was reaching the point where he had very little hope left, where he thought all that would ever come of Natasha’s plan was Tony’s longing looks and Loki’s sad smiles, but then, to his utter shock, _months_ after Natasha had suggest the plan to get their humans together - something finally changed.

Clint hadn’t known what to make of it at first. Loki had come by to pick up Natasha one afternoon as he always did, but he hadn’t been his usual smirking self. His smiles had been tight and his hand clammy and stiff when it had patted both Natasha and Clint on the head. Clint had exchanged a puzzled glance with Nat, but she had only frowned in similar confusion before following her human to the kitchen and Clint had been right behind her.

Ever since Loki had become a frequent visitor to his apartment, Tony had made a point of stocking tea for Loki. He was always ready to brew the taller man a cup when he came to collect Natasha. Having noticed the stiffness to Loki’s movements, Tony had already turned on the kettle and was readying him a mug from the moment Loki had walked in the door. Loki was now sitting at the barstool by the kitchen counter while Tony prepared a tea for Loki and a coffee for himself. He was still flicking Loki concerned glances in between pouring the water and milk.

Clint had watched them from his position sitting on the floor; listening to the way Tony tried to prompt Loki into speaking about his day and how the other human’s answers were distracted and short. Loki was also quick to use the mug of tea placed in front of him as a means of looking away from Tony and running his nervous fingers over the ceramic.

“Something’s wrong with your human,” Clint had murmured to Natasha in the silence that had fallen, unable to stop himself from feeling worried. 

While Clint knew that Loki being upset would distress Tony, that wasn’t the cat’s only concern; Clint had grown fond of the other human in the time spent with him. He was affectionate, kind, and was far easier to tempt into giving out extra chicken and fish than Tony was. Clint also didn’t like to see Loki so uncomfortable and out of character, it made him want to paw at the taller human's leg and try to make him focus on Clint until he smiled. 

Natasha was obviously growing more worried than she would admit. She didn’t even respond to Clint, she just made her way over to Loki and began to twin around his legs before leaning her body against one of them, offering comfort and support for her tense human.

Clint was tempted to join her, but Tony was leaning over the counter, focusing on Loki with the same intensity he gave his inventions. Clint knew this was important and he wanted to stay where he was able to see both human’s reactions until he knew who would best need his comfort. His ginger tail still twitched in agitation as he waited for more details to follow.

“Seriously, Loki,” Tony said when his more generic questions had given him little in the way of answers, “something’s wrong. What happened?”

Loki looked at Tony for a long moment, before he sucked in a noticeable breath and finally admitted, “My brother phoned me.” 

Tony’s eyes instantly filled with realisation and sympathy. Natasha had started to bare her teeth at the mention of the man, her fur standing on end in obvious agitation. Loki rarely spoke about his family, but it was obvious from the little he did say that there was nothing but unhappiness and bitterness in his past. Loki's brother was trying to mend bridges, but Loki still seemed more inclined to burn them than assist with the construction. 

“And I take it he didn’t call to apologise for being a giant dick all your life?” Tony quipped attempting for humour and earning a small, barely perceptible smile from Loki - but it quickly fell from his face.

He focused back on the cup in his hands, turning it with small motions, his brow furrowed in a scowl. 

“No,” Loki eventually replied, his voice quiet but filled with the frustration and sarcasm that always formed when discussing his family. “Thor has instead, in all his _infinite wisdom_ , decided to set me up on a blind date.”

Tony’s eyes widened and he tensed, his face falling at the words only to be quickly masked before Loki could see it. “Oh.” He plastered on a smile and summoned fake cheer. “Did he manage someone even remotely like your type?”

Loki was still staring at his tea. “Actually, he has grown much more perceptive since his youth. He showed me a photo and they are... rather attractive.” Loki’s eyes flicked up to Tony’s and for a moment he looked incredibly unsure, before he pressed his lips together tightly. When he continued his voice was firm and determined, “But I told Thor I would have to get back to him before I agreed to attend.” He tilted his chin, holding Tony’s gaze as he declared, “I need to know if the one I _actually_ want would like to go on a date with me, or if I should accept that he doesn't and settle for somebody else.”

For a moment, Tony started to smile, looking excited, relieved and happy in that split-second before he blinked and something came over his face that stole his enthusiasm and faded his smile. Tony glanced away from Loki and Clint want to _howl_ at him, but he stayed quiet, his tail flicking even faster as his claws ached with the need to be released so he could _scratch_ his human if he dared make a mess of this.

When Tony eventually spoke, his voice was soft and filled with a self-deprecation that he didn’t same capable of hiding, “This um, this person you want... would he... would he happen to be a billionaire?”

Loki had stayed watching him the entire time, nervous and trying not to show it, but his eyes quickly narrowed as he realised what was being asked and worried about in that single phrase.

“Maybe,” Loki admitted and making Tony flinch slightly, but Loki continued, soft and firm, “but to me, he's just Tony.” 

Tony blinked and his gaze snapped back to Loki, shocked and longing and desperate to believe. The expression made Clint _ache_ to comfort him and Loki must have felt the same as he reached out and lightly rested his hand over Tony’s where it rested on the counter.

“He drinks far too much coffee and he definitely doesn’t sleep enough,” Loki abruptly stated, making Tony snort a little. “He adores his cat in a way that’s incredibly endearing, but he has enough piling electronics and cat toys in his apartment that it’s an absolutely hazard and it frustrates me every time I step inside.” 

Tony laughed, a sheepish smile curling at his lips and prompting Loki to grin softly in reply. Tony even seemed to lose a little of his tension and it filled Clint with sudden hope.

Loki briefly glanced down at their hands before looking back at Tony. His smile became a little shy, but he still held Tony’s gaze. “He also makes me feel happier than anyone else ever has." He squeezed Tony's hand before telling him, the words full of honesty and spoken like a promise, "He could have a hundred dollars in his bank or a billion, I truly don't care. I’ve always been more interested in seeing his smile than learning what's in his wallet.”

The wave of relief that swept through Tony made his shoulder’s drop and had him letting out a shaky exhale. Loki didn’t comment on it, he just squeezed the other man’s hand again and in response, Tony shifted his palm so that he could carefully link their fingers together. It made surprise briefly fill the taller man’s emerald eyes before he grinned almost boyishly.

Clint just felt an overwhelming urge to bounce around the room with the growing thrill of success and his own bubbling happiness. He looked over at Natasha whose eyes were alight with satisfaction. He could hear her purring from where he sat.

“So,” Tony eventually spoke, a hint of tease entering his voice, “You only interested in seeing his smile, huh?” 

Clint looked up in time to see Loki smirk at Tony, some of his natural confidence returning as his eyes pointedly ran down Tony’s chest before dropping to where his hips disappeared behind the counter. “Well, there are other parts I would like to become acquainted with as well.”

Tony chuckled. “I think that could be arranged. Of course, that would require this guy to say yes to your offer for a date.”

“Ah,” and there was a small hint of nerves tightening Loki’s eyes, “and does he say yes?”

Tony grinned at him, wide, happy and without a hint of hesitation. “He absolutely does.”

The way that Loki smiled matched the other human for joy and excitement. Clint could only sit proud and thrilled with how far their humans had come. The two men were looking at each other as if there was nothing and no one else in the world; their hands were still tightly linked and they seemed as if they could stay in that moment for their entire lives.

Clint was so busy staring at them that he didn’t even notice Natasha had moved until she bumped her shoulder against his own. He startled slightly and looked over at her. She just nodded towards the living room, obviously offering the two humans their privacy and Clint was quick to follow her as they made their way towards the sofa.

They jumped up onto the cushions and got themselves comfortable, curling up together in a way that had become natural after weeks of deliberately adopting the position to trick their humans. Clint let out a soft, purring sigh of happiness and closed his eyes easily.

He had to wonder how long it would take their humans to realise they were life mates now. Clint was hoping it wouldn't be long. He was already looking forward to having Natasha and Loki stay with them always.

Clint really did prefer when he had his family close, happy and living together.

It made the ginger cat purr contently, hearing Natasha follow along with him as they fell asleep to the sound of their humans talking softly and planning where they would go on their very first date.

**Author's Note:**

> WELL. THERE YOU GO. I'VE EDITED THIS A ZILLION TIMES I'M CALLING IT DONE AND YEAH.
> 
> (Also, I kept wanting to make Nat a black cat but couldn't find a cute picture to link so I WENT AGAINST CONVENTION AND MADE HER CALICO. WHICH I ALSO LIKE. SO THERE XD)
> 
> Also, additional headcanon fun stuffs (because it didn't make it into the story):
> 
> Loki and Tony have a bit of a shy, excited talk and plan their date. They leave the cats in one of their apartments and both cats make a point of being awake and watching them when they come home after a lovely evening. They share a super soft and sweet kiss in the doorway and both cats get to hear all the giggly/flailing/happiness/recount of the date from the boys that night and the next day.
> 
> Loki and Tony go out on a few more dates with the cats staying in the apartments until Tony says "stay the night" at the end of a date and Loki says "yes". The cats aren't stupid and avoid the closed bedroom door and when Loki and Tony come out to have breakfast in the morning Natasha and Clint are _so smug_ over the success of their plan. And Tony totally sneaks them some bacon and Loki totally does too and both cats get lots of hugs and pets and gratitude for their role in getting these damn boys together.
> 
> And yes there are arguments and issues that crop up and there is probably a couple of times where they fight and yell and pass days without talking - but for the most part they're happy and in love and Tony knows Loki loves him for who he _is_ and Loki knows that Tony loves him too.
> 
> And then there is the time when it's been a year of dating and they're in Tony's apartment together and cooking a meal, laughing, joking and being domestic and happy. And Tony wraps his arms around Loki's waist and quietly, nervously asks Loki to move in with him. And Loki freezes for all of a movement before whispering _yes_ and Natasha and Clint are purring and pleased with themselves and _excited_ about the fact that _finally_ these two idiots have decided to make themselves permanent mates. Clint and Nat still don't know how or why it took them so damn long, but they're happy nonetheless XD


End file.
